Friday, April 3, 2015

The Muse vs. The Master

Last night I was reminded I was a teacher.

I didn't exactly forget this little tidbit. I still taught three classes a week but I was kind of on autopilot. I felt like my passion was missing.

I desperately want to attend a yoga training to reignite my fire. I need to attend a training. I always return refreshed and inspired. But financially that's just not possible right now.

Then last night as I was teaching to a new student I had one of those moments where I swear I heard the Universe say "This! This right here is what you are supposed to be doing." I've actually had moments like this before. Apparently I need reminded of it regularly.

Also this week I was reminded I was a writer.

Again, I didn't exactly forget this fact. I've written sporadically but not nearly as often as I want to or as I used to. I haven't had the creative energy to write for about a year now. I've just been zapped by life.

Then I got an email offering me a writing opportunity. A writing opportunity that paid money! Hey, get paid for something I enjoy doing? Well OK then! And the timing was perfect considering I'm currently unemployed and looking for a new full time job.

When I told my kids about the email Kid 2 said "well you better sit your butt down and start pumping out some words!"

And pump out some words I did. So far it has been received really well and I'm waiting to hear back to see if we can turn this into a regular paying gig.

So I'm a little unsure where I should be putting my focus right now. Obviously I'm sending out resumes daily for a full time job to pay the bills. But my creative side is also fighting to re-emerge.

My heart says "Go! Follow your bliss! Write. Teach yoga. Walk the beach and drink wine!"

My responsible logical brains says "Girl, be for real."

I can't help but wonder if this is the Universe's way of telling me that I am a creative soul and my soul needs nourished. And encouraging me to find a way to pay the bills with writing and yoga.

Or it's just wishful thinking and I'm grateful for this time I have now. The responsible thing for me to do is to follow the path to a full time job that pays the bills but runs the risk of withering my soul.

But maybe, just maybe, if I stay open enough to possibility, a different path will present itself that allows me to flourish both creatively and financially.

This post is part of #AprilMoon15 a series of daily writing prompts found at Kat McNally Words To Soothe The Weary Soul.


  1. Why don't you do your yoga and writing in the meantime - keep sending out your resumes but put your focus on what brings in money right this minute. Who knows, by the time someone replies to your applications, you may already have created enough work to satisfy all your needs doing what you love and you might find that the yoga and writing have off shoots as well that you haven't even considered yet. Good luck and have a great Easter.
    Fil’s Place - Old songs and Memories

  2. Fascinating! Go with your instinct, I say. The Universe is clearly sending you signs and nudging you on the shoulder. I feel that this Blood Moon is very much tying into our Seer side, and reminding us that toxic situations are deadly, no matter how remunerative they might be. Blessed be!

  3. I agree with Alienora - it does appear that the Universe is sending some strong messages your way, but your 'Inner Adult' is having trouble with might want to send your 'Inner Adult' on a long vacation while the pieces of your destiny fall into place! ;)

  4. It doesn't have to be all one or the other but making room for something that makes you heart soar is so very important. I agree with you that staying open is the key. I know it's not always easy, though. xx

  5. It's such a hard one. Hoping that you are able to find that sweet spot which contains both creativity and financial security xx