Sunday, March 9, 2014

A Weird Afternoon Between Mom, Daughter and (Dead) Grandmother

I don't often feel my mom's presence around me. But this afternoon she came through loud and clear.

Me and the kids had spent the afternoon out with friends, and during dinner kid #4's behavior was really disappointing to me. All I could think about was my mom would never have allowed this.

I admit I may have over-reacted a little to the situation. Partly because I was shocked at the way my daughter was acting, but also too because if my mom would not approve of this behavior then she wouldn't approve of me as the mother in this situation.

Even when things calmed down I said a couple times to my daughter "Mimi would be so disappointed."

As I sit here now I wonder who she would be more disappointed in? Me or my daughter?

Kid 4 is a 12, almost 13, year old girl and with it has the typical pre-teen attitude thing going on. Although not enjoyable, it is typical age appropriate behavior. But as I sat there and observed the situation this afternoon, I realized kid 4 hasn't had the same opportunities and experiences that her older siblings have had because of where we now live.

She doesn't know how to appropriately handle herself in certain situations and that is my fault.

I know this post is really rambling tonight.

I'm still a little confused how I feel about it all.