Friday, July 29, 2016

Just A Magical Memorable Thursday Night

You are a Great mom and I think u became a better mom when u became mom And dad !

I've decided that compliment means more to me than any other I've received lately.

Tonight was just a Thursday night. Like most other Thursday nights we've had the past couple years.

But then, something changed.

It started with Kid 5 asking to pick up his friend and go PokemonGo hunting. I, as usual, groaned and told him how tired I was. But then Kid 4, and this is the really weird part, said "oh come on, I'll drive and we'll just go out for a bit."

(Note: Kid 4 has her permit and looks for any excuse to drive. But to help her younger brother hunt Pokemon? No, never.)

While Kid 5 and his friend ran through the park hunting Pokemon, Kid 4 and I sat by the car and listened to 80's and 90's music: Black Eyed Peas, Backstreet Boys, old Gwen Stefani hits. We sat by the car and sang loud. We laughed louder. We even busted out a few dance moves.

Three fun-filled hours later I got this comment on one of my Facebook posts from the evening:

You are a Great mom and I think u became a better mom when u became mom And dad !

Wow. I had to think about that for a minute. And, I think she's right.

I think I did become a bit of a better mom when I took on the role of mom and dad.

After the dust settled from the divorce, and the kids accepted the new reality that they had a father who no longer wanted to be a part of their life, the burden of being mom and dad fell to me.

But with the burden came freedom as well. 

So much of the pressure was off. I was no longer afraid to upset my ex-husband or to make him mad. I no longer was constantly on guard for his next outburst or had to be hyper vigilant to make sure he didn't act out towards the kids.

Both me and the kids were free to finally be ourselves. We now had the freedom to laugh without the fear of angering him. 

At one point tonight, Kid 4 asked if I realized it was already 11:30. 

"Oh, shoot no I didn't. Hey have you heard of MC Hammer," I asked as I started singing along to Can't Touch This. 

We never would have felt comfortable enough to be hanging out in a local park at 11:30pm singing and catching Pokemon. We would have been too afraid of what we would come home to.

But now, yes I am mom and dad, and sometimes, often times, that is a heavy load to carry.

But there are also times, maybe I need to let there be more of these times, that it's a great blessing to be the parent who gets to enjoy my kids as well. 

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