Certainty: #reverb14 Day 1

Today, I invite you to take a quiet moment to consider: what can you say right now with certainty?

The only thing I can say right now with absolute certainty is.... I know nothing.

I know I care too much and I feel too deeply. I know this has caused me a lot of pain.
I know that friendships end.
I know jobs you pour your heart and soul in to will eventually come to an end.
I know people you love don't necessarily love you back.
I know that being honest doesn't mean someone won't lie to me.
I know that I am an intelligent woman who has made foolish choices.

What I don't know is why. I don't know why things that feel so right can't just be right. What I don't know is am I being too trusting or is the world too untrustworthy. What I don't know is what lesson I'm supposed to be learning, or if there really is no lesson and it just is what it is.

I believed hard work brought prosperity. Nope, it just brings exhaustion and less time with my family. I believed there was either good or bad. Nope, there are many shades of gray. I believed if I did the right thing others would do right by me. Nope, when it comes down to it people will naturally protect themselves first. I believed the truth was the truth. Nope, two people can tell two very different stories.

I thought my life was on a path with a specific end goal in mind. I was wrong.

I've been wrong about many things and many people.

I know this post is pretty depressing. I don't know how long I'll be in this place.


This post is part of #reverb14, a series of daily writing prompts to explore the year passed and to manifest the year ahead. This prompt was found at Kat McNally Words To Soothe The Weary Soul.